My Descent Into Madness

Anyone Out There?

I often get asked how I got into all of this. Ever since I was a kid, I have been obsessed with astronomy, and constantly find myself thinking about the possibly of other life out there in the universe. I always thought we were egotistical morons to think that humans are the only intelligent life in this entire universe. Please. #Earthisflat

As I was applying for colleges, one of my top picks was Cornell University to study Astronomy (astrobiology). If it weren’t for the almost full scholarship I got at Chapman University (Orange, CA) in the theatre department, I would have been headed there instead.

Carl Sagan Planetary Society
At the time I was pondering astrobiology, my hero, Carl Sagan, was still a professor at Cornell University. I just dated myself, didn’t I?
Eenie Meenie Miney Mo. With Which God Should I Go?
The word of God

Unlike the small town in Oregon where I spent my high school years, California offered much more diversity. It was a very exciting time for me. But the one thing that shocked me the most was the diversity in religions. It really got me thinking about all the different faiths in the world. I mean, what if one of them is right? What if I end up in hell because I didn’t take the time to find out? My parents never pushed religion on me growing up, so I had no leaning one way or the other.

During my sophomore year in college, I decided I wanted to do a documentary series on finding religion. I began my research by reading The Old Testament, since it was the basis for the biggest religions in the world. When I read it, everything came to a screeching halt. To this day, I still get all hot and sweaty, and filled with anger thinking about it. I am going to get a crapload of heat for this, probably several death threats as well, but the conclusion I came up with was that God is a dick! I was flabbergasted that billions of people have read The Old Testament and still choose to follow it. There was very little I saw of an “all loving” God, but rather an egotistical God that put you through hell in order to prove how much you love him.

People keep telling me that the New Testament shows a different side to the story, and I must admit I have not read that yet. But reading the old one got me started on the path of discovery. I soon learned that many stories in the bible were written thousands of years before in Sumerian/Assyrian/Babylonian cuneiform tablets, but they told them in a slightly different way. That got me thinking, could the Old Testament actually be based on something else, rather than being the original tale? The earlier Sumerian version tells quite a different story of the creation of man (yet the similarities between the two versions are too many to be just a coincidence). So which is true? The first account? The retelling in the bible? The Sumerian version also gives a reason why God comes across like such a jerk, which I will discuss in a future post.


Now I need a drink! Just the memory of what I read in the Old Testament makes me so mad. If Jesus really did turn water into wine, I might need to read the New Testament and become a believer! I will get into deep discussions about all this in my blog. When I do, you Christians and Catholics can slam me all you want. But let me present all my evidence first. Unlike some others, I will actually listen and take into consideration all you have to say. My goal is the truth, whatever that may be. So hold off.  Your time will come.


While my primary interest is in all the ancient astronaut stuff, I do love me some UFOs. If you really take the time to look, there are some very convincing cases. The most intriguing to me is the Rendlesham Forest case. Please do search that in Google if you are wanting a case with some solid evidence behind it. I also recommend the documentary I Know What I Saw, which I have embedded below. If for any reason it doesn’t play, please contact me so I can find a new link for you.

But you may wonder if I have seen a UFO. Technically, yes. And by that I mean an unidentified flying object. I have no proof it was aliens flying it. Here’s my story: I was on the beach in Oceanside, CA with my boyfriend at the time. He stopped abruptly and pointed to the sky. Two tiny shiny objects (reflecting a reddish/gold color from the sunlight) were darting to and fro, moving much faster than any modern day aircraft possibly could. We thought maybe we were imagining things when two fighter jets came barreling toward them out of Camp Pendleton. The two UFOs zoomed off out toward the ocean, and the fighter jets made a sharp turn to follow them.

Triangular UFO - our technology

One thing is certain, they moved at a speed and angle at which no modern known aircraft are capable of. Or aircraft that we know of, that is. They say what we see is 20 years behind what is actually used and being developed by the military. So could it be that it was some advanced craft from another government that hit our airspace and got chased off? Possibly. But if so, why didn’t we chase it off with our own advanced technology? I mean, we are the most advanced country out there, right? Why did we go after then with measly fighter jets? I am not sure what is scarier: aliens or another country with craft and weapons that are much more advanced than ours.

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